chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I party with great urgency now.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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