My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize