And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
the day after is always just damage control
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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