So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
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