Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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