so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize