I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize