I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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