I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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