Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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