Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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