I wanna bring you to show and tell
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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