We won't sleep together?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
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you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
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I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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