If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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