We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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