Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize