a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize