I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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