hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize