i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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