At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
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I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
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Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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