lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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