So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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