We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize