I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
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did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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