And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
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