my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize