chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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