Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize