imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize