I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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