I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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