i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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