Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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