That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize