I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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