Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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