The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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