Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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