evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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