Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
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Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
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My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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