my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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