I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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