Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize