And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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