Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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