So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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