I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize