I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
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the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
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Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize