You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize